Review: Ninja Gaiden Sigma

TonyDaytona

90%

I never played any of the Ninja Gaiden games before because I just think Ninjas are fucking lame. Wimpy looking Asians that own throwing-stars and ninja-boots aren’t cool (Tzo), but Ryu (main character) looks more like an NFL linebacker than one of these rejects: www.realultimatepower.net (a classic). I threw a bitch-fit about reviewing NGS, but after seeing the alternatives (Transformers or Vampire Rain) I agreed with Tzo’s choice. I’ll admit, I still think ninjas suck (and Japanese porn is equally weak), but NGS is a fucking great game.
   NGS is the true definition of an “action game.” I can only describe the intense game-play as a chaotic storm of throws, punches, flips, and slashes. I was a tsunami of pain that bled the ranks of my enemy. My face was pwnzed a few dozen times, but the difficulty is fair, enforces the use of tactics, and makes you appreciate every victory.
   The alternate to Ryu is a fine piece of ninja-ass named Rachel “Fiend” Hunter. Rachel’s story is intertwined with Ryu and you don’t feel forced to play her character. Rachel is slower than Ryu, but probably because she’s lugging around an extra 20lbs. of tits. By the way, what’s up with the Asian fantasy of nailing a hot, white-girl with huge tits? Let me clear this up, unless you’re from a billionaire household (Son, Mikitani, or Shigeta) it’s not going to happen anytime soon.
   Moving forward, NGS is not the cutting-edge title PS3 owners are waiting for, but it’s one of the best action games of all time and I won’t fight Tzo if he wants to review the sequel.
  

EuroTrash

85%

Déjà vu… It might be the summer of movie sequels, but it’s also the summer of ported games. In a massive delaying tactic, it appears as if the entire industry is stalling the public by throwing every old title at the latest consoles. NG was a respectable title on the Xbox and it was only a matter of time before it was ported to the PS3.
   I enjoyed NG on the Xbox, but I was hesitant to revisit the epic battles of Ryu Hayabusa. The original NG was brilliant, but it was one of the hardest action games I ever played. I had flashbacks of the endless reloads to conquer the brutal bosses or punishing stages. After receiving my copy of NGS I simply left it on my desk until I found the courage to play.
   After a few beers and a reminder of my deadline, I was determined to reconquer the fiends of the Vigoor Empire. I immediately noticed NGS adopted the next-gen graphical standards (1080p / 60fps) and produced a brilliant picture. My only grievance was the twitchy camera, but the fluid animations made me quickly forget about the obstructive views.
   The controls felt responsive (faster & more precise attacks) and the enhanced movement (easier climbing & auto water-walking) were an added benefit. However, the Wii-like sensor on the Sixaxis controller was crap. To quote TonyD, “Everyone gives their dick a good shake after a piss, but anything more than 3 shakes is masturbation.” As you can tell, I wasn’t a fan of shaking my controller.
   In retrospect, my latest journey with Ryu was the most rewarding and thankfully, it was less painful this time around.

Tzo

84%

Ninjas were the special forces of feudal Japan- part infiltrator, part spy, and part assassin. What idiots, (TonyD) don’t realize, is that the techniques developed through ninjutsu are the basis of modern clandestine or guerilla warfare. In addition, ninja’s weren’t bound by the warrior code of honor (Bushido) and were employed to handle the darker strategies of the daimyo (feudal rulers).
   NGS, the latest version of Tecmo’s classic action game, captures the spirit of ninjutsu and effectively merges it into the modern myth of the ninja warrior. It is difficult to recall many games that provide similar levels of intense combat and unrelenting action. In summary, TonyD knows shit about the history of the ninja and NGS is still a great game on the PS3.
   If you’re new to NG, the story is a tale of revenge and justice. The protagonist, Ryu, finds his village destroyed and must recover and ultimately destroy an ancient artifact (Dark Dragon Blade). The story takes you through countless battles and several epic boss fights. The HD graphics and reworked levels were a welcome touch. With over 30 hrs of content the game remains a decent value.
   Another new feature is the ability to play Rachel for three chapters and in mission mode. Rachel is a poorly conceived character that is a result of the devs’ determination to make her different (weaker), they also made her boring (few moves) and ineffective (too slow).
   Overall, NGS is a great game, but thrice baked, it might be overdone.